Having a healthy debate with someone is part of life, it’s a great way for adults to come to some agreement or compromise about a situation. Allowing your children to see healthy debates teaches them how to handle conflict in their own lives too. It’s a win-win situation when two or more adults can have a healthy debate about a topic without foul language, name calling or yelling. There are debate clubs in schools for a reason, debating is healthy and actually good for everyone, as long as the debate is respectful to all parties involved and doesn’t escalate into a full blown scene from World War II.
If everyone in this world agreed with each other 100%, lived the same 100% way of life and raised their children 100% the same, life would be pretty boring, mundane and uneventful. We would not be engaged to work our brain cells in healthy ways and everyone would walk around in this dreary robotic manner. I for one, love a healthy debate, but with my hot opinions on some topics such as parenting and relationships, it can be difficult for me to have a healthy debate.
I have learned over the past few years how to properly handle a healthy debate and no longer treat other people as if they are wrong and I am 100% right. In all honesty, I am shocked when I am right over wrong because I tend to be wrong more often than not. There is a time when a healthy debate, no matter how healthy it may be, gets to a point where neither party is willing to give a little on their end to help the conversation or situation get resolved amicably. When the point is made that they are not budging on their stance and they are flat out refusing to even understand where you are coming from, then it’s time to simply walk away.
At the point when a conversation or situation gets to a stalemate, so to speak, it’s time for all involved to simply do what they see best given the circumstances and hope that the end result will be a positive one. There are no definites in life, all we can do is 1) know when to walk away and 2) have faith that whatever is meant to be best in the long haul will happen eventually.
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have this dream I dream tonight
Full of laughter, Full of love
With a white flying dove
Life is simple, so they say
Smiles and laughter fill each day
Til a storm cloud looms above
And there goes that white dove
Falling down, down, down
No one is around.
Life is what you make it
Life will move on, and so will you
Love yourself and others will too!
Usually when I get annoyed with someone who has placed judgement upon another person, I always back it up with “well it is human nature to judge”, but I wonder, is being judgmental a learned behavior or is it truly just something we have instilled within us from birth that only “comes out to play” as we age?
Well let’s see, based on everything I read it seems I am not alone in referring to human nature when discussing the subject of being judgmental, ZenHabitats referred to this as being part of our own human nature make up. We are all guilty from time to time of judging another person or situation without knowing all of the facts.
From a person feeding a family of five on one online income to that mom in the grocery store with the screaming child, we all have that moment where we either criticize the way they live or how they parent, we judge them in a negative light without having ever lived a moment in their shoes. Then we have the people who just insist on making other peoples lives more miserable or sound worse than theirs to avoid looking in the mirror at their own self to fix their own issues.
It doesn’t matter why a person judges but honestly, this quote says it all for me,
No accurate thinker will judge another person by that which the other person’s enemies say about him. — Napoleon Hill
So please remember, it’s common to judge situations and people at first glance, but when you make a habit out of it, well then maybe you should take a moment to think harder before making that judgment and take a long hard look in the mirror at your life and self.
I lack the personality type to stand my ground with how I feel inside. I used to be so good at standing my ground and sticking up for what I knew to be best for my emotional well being but somewhere along lack of sleep and running hoops for my lovely children to have their special activities I got too tired to stand up for me.
The positive part of my life is that it works, sort of. BUT if you talk to any of my close personal friends they will tell you it doesn’t work for me. Which is true. BUT I can’t seem to tell myself that in a way that helps me move forward & do something about it.
I tell myself that I am just too tired to make any logical decisions for myself. Sure I can parent and make decisions as a Mom in a logical way but when it comes to me and my emotions I just wonder if I make excuses to not deal with things.
I have so much on my plate already that I love and I just can’t handle one more decision to make. Not now. Maybe after the holidays I can but not now. So for now I focus on the awesome positive part of my life, I work from home to support my kids, I have more time for my kids and I get to enjoy the young years of all three children before they are teens and want nothing to do with me.
Okay so I am pretty outspoken, flirtatious and well a very passionate person. I mean no harm when I am like this, obviously I am not going to go hit on some married dude, nor do I really go out of my way to flit with men. The problem that makes females look at me oddly is that my personality is super bubbly most times and that type of personality, at least with me, comes off wrong, completely 100% wrong when speaking to the opposite sex.
It’s funny because I recall when traveling to an event that I had to remind some males that I am not hitting on them if I brush my hand on their arm or tap their shoulder or even give them a hug. I am not really that type of person to really think that because I just hugged you we have to go have sex now. I mean seriously, we are living in reality right?
I get it, I do love flirting with people and if they flirt with me I am bound to flirt back, but that’s it. I have boundaries and even though I am very deprived in the affection area I am not desperate. Even when totally 100% drunk off my butt, I still won’t give it up so to speak unless obviously I was planning on doing that in the first place. LOL
In all reality I have kids and I have a business to run, I don’t have room to go off running around with men. I have little interest in being with any man because I have too much to deal with without thinking about a relationship. I need my life in order before any major relationship issues are handled or even figured out.
Right now … I just am getting really sick of the idea that men seem to think I have “hit on me” written on my forehead, I guess when I am 80 I will miss these days of men thinking I am hot in Pajamas, no make up and hair a mess, but right now I just don’t have time for the pick up lines – been there done that.
My life is so chaotic lately that I feel as if I am walking like a zombie. Maybe my day isn’t really happening, I feel as if it’s a daydream. You know that dream that occurs over and over and you can’t seem to get rid of it. I would rather call it a dream because it’s motherhood but sometimes I feel as if it’s close to a nightmare. Between the sleepless nights and the constant 100mph running of my two sons I can’t determine if this is real or fantasy some days.
I truly never thought raising kids would become such a battle. I never thought working from home would mean I would be doing a balance act every single day of my life. I feel as if I slept walked through most of my sons lives because it has been so hectic. A divorce, a few moves, everything is almost subliminal to me at times.
I sometimes wish I had a stronger person than me around to pick me up during those weak moments so that I no longer feel like a walking zombie, unable to feel emotions, unable to smile and unable to remember a simple memory such as what I had for breakfast that morning.
This Fall I will have two kids in school and only one home with me, I am hoping this will help slow me down a bit so that I can focus on catching up on sleep and work.