The past year has brought on so many changes as well as challenges, I survived another difficult winter season full of my own mood swings and sad times. It’s true, I suffer deeply in the Winter months from mood issues. With the lack of sunlight Winter brings upon us, I always find myself struggling. This scenario gets worse each year, based on what others say I think it’s called Seasonal Depression. You can imagine how difficult it is for a positive person to suffer from that, it’s like an extreme opposite of my norm and makes life hard especially while trying to remain to be a positive influence and example for my children.
Winter is over though. Each day I wake up to warmer days and the warmth fills my soul with happiness. I find each day I get happier and happier.
Then things happen. It’s like as the season changes my mood is better, more positive and I feel closer to who I really am. That part is wonderful, the part that is difficult is that each day I get closer to getting more work done, having a steady work schedule and seem to be making head way with life; my kids get sick. Like today, all three kids are home sick and I have a ton of work to do. Money is needed and today was my day to create a new website offering some unique business services and website content; a site selling myself and content in a way that I have always wanted to do – focus on marketing and content sales.
Instead I spend today sitting on my laptop trying to find some positive in today. The rain outside is making it dreary, the kids with fevers make me fear getting sick and I just wish I could curl up in bed to sleep. Winter was rough, I just would like to have a few weeks of Spring being happy with little to no stress, but that’s not how my life ever works. The reason I am strong is because I have to face new challenges every day, or at least every week brings a new challenge.
I will survive this, but I am struggling. I think time away will be beneficial for me. I long to have one night away, in a hotel or motel, away from the challenges life brings so I can just sit and be me. No one to answer to. No one to talk to. Just me. Alone. Reading a book. Singing to myself, sleeping. Whatever suits my fancy.
Cheers to getting some me time soon and kids getting better quick!