I am a firm believer that every parent needs a break from their children, it’s healthy for both child and adult. What happens when you are a parent who never gets a break? There’s that child that no family will take, there’s that one child not yet in school all day and so it’s you and them all day long, 24/7 and you never seem to get more than a moments break when you go to the grocery store for a rare trip without this child.

Being around hyperactive children or moody children 24/7 means that you could in turn start to feel their symptoms too. Becoming ADD is something I swear has happened with me having to keep up with the boys who have extremely high energy levels. My three year and and I are always together and he is on high speed from the moment he crawls out of bed until the moment he falls asleep.

I can’t seem to keep my mind on one subject at a time, if I don’t speak when a thought enters my mind then that thought disappears forever. This means I tend to interrupt people and I don’t mean to be rude it’s just that if i don’t either speak or write that thought down then it will be forever lost in space. I am trying to find ways to keep my head on track but honestly the only thing that seems to help at any level is writing about my life, spreading positive thoughts and writing about ways I work to keep my mindset in a positive direction.

The weeks I can’t seem to get a moment to write make me even worse with ADD like symptoms where I can’t focus, I get sad, I start sulking and lose my positive mindset. Writing has become something that assists in keeping my bad thoughts at bay and believe me with all I have gone through and all I do go through on a daily basis, anger does appear in my feelings here and there.

Although I’ve learned ways to cope with my bitter feelings towards certain people who have come and gone in my life, when writing isn’t possible I can feel the symptoms of lack of focus, bitterness and anger as well as the question of “what if” or “why” enter my brain. The problem is my questions regarding what ifs or whys will never fully be answered so there’s no reason in thinking about them. So I have to wonder, is it truly possible for a parent to have the symptoms of a child diagnosis when they spend 24/7 with that child? I say yes.

As a parent I know that it’s extremely important to be that safe haven for your child, there are a lot of dangers in the world, there are a lot stressful situations that will come up in life and it’s the parents job to be that child’s person of trust to come to when times are difficult.

What happens when a child comes to a parent with a tough situation yet is faced with the reality that there is little the parent can do to fix the situation? I like to think with every situation there is a solution, however, the solution isn’t always immediate when it needs to be immediate.

It’s so heartbreaking to know that you, as the parent, are not able to just swoop in and fix the issues that need to be fixed, why? Well because there is a process and sometimes that process makes your child feel as if they are not worthy, that what they have confided in you and other trusted adults wasn’t worth a thing. It’s hard to be in a situation like this but one things for sure, if you are that parent, the trusted source your child turns to when times get rough, remember to stay strong, pray and have faith that in good time things will get better.

Do you ever wish you could say things that your children say and just get away with it? Like a two year old who uses the excuse that he’s two to try to get away with doing something naughty. How about my four year old who thinks he is five because the scale says 50lbs, apparently the first number of your weight determines your age now. How about when my daughter just sits in her room and says “I don’t wanna and you can’t make me” after I have told her to take care of her clothes?!

Oh to be a child again, to get away with having energy all day and night, to use a simple excuse to get away with something done wrong, to be able to play all day and night and to be loved like no other? Children are simply amazing, I love every waking moment with mine but some days I wonder …. is it healthy to be around them 24/7? I mean seriously?

My opinion is NO. It is not healthy for you nor your child to be together 24/7. Both parent and child need a break from each other in order to experience life, separation and well to miss each other. I feel that if you are given time to miss your children, truly miss them, then you will appreciate them more when they are around you. It is funny that absence makes the heart grow fonder even for children. I know I have heard this work for relationships between two adults but not for children.

Going back to things children say, they say the most awesome things at time! I love that at age two my son has learned to use the excuse “cuz” whenever I asked him about something or a why question. I bet that comes from me, I am forever answering cuz, now let’s hope he doesn’t pick up the “cuz I said so” response!  In all reality I love children, my included, they are honest, outspoken and just plain sweet as sweet can be!

What do you think? Would you like to venture back to spend one day as a child again? Do you think that there is such a thing as being with a child too much?

I am a firm believer that if you enable a person then you are setting them up for failure. This goes with addictions, living life and raising children. Enabling almost seems to me to be a form of denial, the decision a person has made to ignore the fact that a particular person has a problem. Sometimes I swear I sound like a mean Mama who would rather my child fall down and get back up than have them live in a bubble or world with padded walkways.

I have seen from friends to family how people grow up to be when they have been enabled all of their life or even a portion of their life. I wasn’t enabled by my parents, I fell hard many times, I have failed, I have tripped and I have not always been free and clear of trouble. The reason I am who I am today is because no body enabled me to do the things I did, no one made excuses for my behavior and no one allowed me to make excuses for my behavior or actions. I have always had to face the consequences of my actions, due to this I have learned to have morals and common sense.

I feel that enabling a friend or child is easier than actually stepping back and telling them you love them dearly but can not help them. It is very hard to simply say no to a loved one no matter if blood related or friend, but sometimes doing that will create a better person in the end. This person may dislike you, they may not speak to you forever or many years but when all is said and done that person will look back and thank you for what you did for them.

When you make a decision to allow a person to pick up their own mess and simply be an ear to listen, you are creating a stronger individual person and that my friends is the best thing anyone can do for a person. Thank you to everyone in my life who told me how it was, let me fall on my face and pick myself back up and for those who listened when I needed someone to vent to. Without those people who have come and gone in my life, I would not be the person I am today!

Well okay I have to share that statement with Justin, so our walls, our house and our rules! Either way it’s us and no one else that will tell our children what they can do, can’t do or should do inside of the walls we call our home. That includes a co-parent. I don’t care if that co-parent is super involved, an awesome parent and an amazing person to their child; they still have no right to come into my home and tell our child what they will or will not be allowed to do here, in my home!

Am I wrong or am I right? I love co-parenting, it works so wonderfully. My daughter has it great, or so it seems most times, she has two loving parents who can get along with each other and even attend events, appointments and similar together when it involves her. The only problem is; he apparently thinks it is okay to rule my house too. Nope, notta, sorry not happening!

I don’t care how much this dude helps me out, fathers our child or goes out of his way to be at everything that involves her. Don’t get me wrong I appreciate the help, I think it’s great that my child has a super involved father but mind you I do not take kindly to people coming into my home and telling a child what they can or can’t do. I would never go to this dude’s house and tell my daughter what she can or can’t do behind his walls; those are his walls, his house and his rules. I don’t like his rules in all honesty, there are many where I cringe and wonder if  my daughter will be able to be a child there?! Regardless of my personal feelings of the rules at the other home I feel I have no place to say a thing, why? For starters his rules are not harming my child, even though I have to question if sometimes it’s emotionally harming her having two completely different households, and for second it’s his house and I don’t care if we both have equal rights to her, we also have 100% rights to rule our homes the way we deem fit.

I have been really good at biting my tongue per the request of my daughter but it’s to the point where I want to call up a family meeting and stand my ground. No one other than, maybe, just maybe babysitter, is going to come inside my home and over step boundaries when it comes to my rules! If the rules do her no harm, then leave it be dude! Oh and if you have a problem with it make sure you take it up with me not her! It’s the adults that should be discussing “issues” not a child and parent.

Done … you can move on with your day or leave a comment below telling me what you think about this topic …

Side Note: I don’t mean to sound rude, my daughter has a very involved father who, for the most part, I get along with , but sometimes I swear I wonder where he thinks he has a right to rule my house too.