The Big No-No’s in Online Dating

I tend to be pretty laid back, I can get along with anyone, I can flirt with anyone, and I can seriously go out and have a blast with just about anyone.  There are few things that bother me, or so I thought, in the opposite sex, but now that I’ve put myself out there as being single and am on a couple dating sites; I have found some shit that bugs me. I just have to share some of my new found “no no’s” to online dating …

Online Dating NO NOs

If You have Time to Message Me and Get Angry that I didn’t reply within  10 minuteswell then you clearly have more time on your hands and clearly have not a life of your own.

From previous mistakes with relationships, I have learned that if another person has enough time on their hands to get angry about lack in a quick reply, then they have no life of their own. If this person has no life of their own what is it that they can offer me? Not much. I do not need someone who has no passion in life nor none of their own things to keep them busy – let’s say maybe a job? So if someone gets mad that I am not messaging them quick enough, and then proceeds to show me anger in messages over my lack in quick reply – well then they are not going to hear from me. Anger over lack in quick reply translates to anger in other areas in life.

If you Call me a Whore, Tell me to Bend over, or any other rude message as a first or any future contact- well then you clearly do not know how to treat a woman

I can not make this crap up, calling me a whore for having a full body pic, seriously – it’s a fully clothed, no cleavage showing full body pic. That makes me a whore? I was floored at that random message. Clearly someone who has to tell a woman negative things, wishes to get a rise out of a woman for their own attention needs. I won’t give that attention back.  These days I refuse to believe that men or woman must setup a dating site to get laid, if that is the case then you surely are not the one for me.

Having No Profile Picture – not being superficial but seeing ones face is best when dealing with online dating, even if it’s not really your own face

I totally get that one can have a fake photo online, it’s easily done, but at least have some picture on your profile. I do not reply to non-picture profiles and certainly am not going to reply and give you my email address to email me a picture. If you can’t put your face on a dating profile, then there is clearly something going on that I want no part of.

No MOre Kids

Height, Having Kids, Wanting Kids – people please pay attention to the person who you are about to write to.

For me, the man has to be taller than me. I am not one who wishes to be taller than my man. I would feel like I was towering over him and I like a manly man, a tall manly man.  I have listed a height range on all profiles and yet people below that height always message.

I clearly do not want to have any more kids but if I were to meet someone who had kids of their own, well that is perfect. I would gladly accept and love a partners child(ren). I just do not want to have anymore of my own. Which again, is clearly stated, but for some reason men do not glance to see that and those who want more kids or want kids at all still message me. We clearly are not a fit there, so why waste my time and yours?

Stresses in Online Dating

Shake My Head and Grit My Teeth

For me, it’s so hard not to reply to some of the rude, dumb messages I get on these dating sites, and I am even talking about a paid dating site, people just baffle me. Why pay for a dating site if you are mainly seeking to get into a woman’s pants? Geesh people, there are free sites for that or maybe the bar downtown? I don’t know, couldn’t imagine paying for a site to meet woman just for sex, but to each their own I suppose.

I really want to reply to some of the negative messages I get, after all I am a writer and in me I seek to have this long drawn out response calling these men out and if I were doing the same thing, “hey baby I like what I see, want to get together and bang?” I would expect someone to tell me how it is too. The issue is then you get into this big go around and each of you wants the last word, wasting the time of both of you. So I simply delete the message or block the person depending upon how awful the message was.

This is certainly a journey but so far I have learned through past mistakes a couple of things;

  1. Do not settle for anything less than what you need, want and deserve.
  2. Do not bring a love interest around your kids too soon, for they may get attached and you do not which can lead to heart break.

Wish me luck .. I feel like a fish in water with an alligator about to bite off my head or something like that…at least I am having a good sense of humor about it.

Image Sources (in order of appearance)

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles

Image courtesy of Vlado/

Image courtesy of Master isolated images /

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