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Sometimes you have to make a decision that you never thought you would be able to nor have to make. I was recently faced with one of those type of decisions and all of a sudden the answer to finally just walk away made total sense. Let that person know that I can no longer condone their negative actions, I can no longer listen to them sit up on their high horse acting as if they do no wrong. So begins a new chapter in my life, the chapter of getting off my butt and sticking up for what I believe in no matter who it upsets! This my friends is the start of a newer ME, a person who still is positive, still loves to help others but finally has said enough of the BS from everyone else who only wants to make the people around them miserable. It’s funny because I truly believe this person doesn’t even see how miserable they really are … maybe counseling will do them some good, it did me some good for sure!
I am excited, scared, sad, angry and a bit nervous because I haven’t ever really made a decision quite like this one. This decision involves a family member and I am a hug family person. I have never believed in not talking to your family for long periods of times because you never know if that will be the last time you two spoke. I don’t like leaving loved ones angry and I never let my hubs or children leave the house without a hug and I love you. That is me, who I am and who I have been as long as I can remember. I have had friends who haven’t talked to one or both of their parents in years and overall they were okay with their decision, they usually agreed that it totally sucks that things had to be this way, but reality is life isn’t full of easy decisions.
A person must take time to realize that you didn’t choose who your family is, you can only choose your friends. When you are a child, under the adult age of 18, you are sort of stuck living this life with the family you have and there is not much you can do about it. Sure you can rebel, you can talk back, you can act out, but all this does is anger your family and bring on negative attention, believe me been there done that! I was a good student in school but a rebellious child at home for sure! As soon as I became old enough to venture out on my own, well about age 17 I had my own apartment & that was my senior year in high school, I was happy to be free of the reigns of my house, I was happy to be able to make my own decisions, to smile for no reason, to laugh, to blast music. I enjoyed all the simple things in life back then but of course I wasn’t a parent.
Now that I am a mother of three children I have to make decisions based on whats best for them and it’s not best that my children see me run down by a family member to the point of crying unstoppable. I can’t cry any longer, and I can’t allow this person to continue to mess with my head as they did for so many years growing up. I am me, I am happy, I am confident I do the best I can and I have a huge enough support system online and in real life that losing one person may break my heart deeply, but it won’t break ME.
Powerful thinking. God bless you and your family. “This too shall come to pass and all will calm”
Pure egotistical, selfish, ungrateful nonsense. I hope your cyberfriends are there for you in times of need as this family member you speak of has always been as well as all the other members in your family. Speak about negativity!!!No one is perfect,we all do the best we can, we all make mistakes,some of us don’t dwell on the past and continue to blame others for our problems..You think this is a “good” article? I think it is down right hurtful.You cut to the core of this person, but that was your intention,wasn’t it?? Good job, Brandy.
We are totally disappointed in you!!
May your words help many others. Look forward to your articles.
Sometimes the best decisions are the hardest ones to make, and the most criticized. Good for you for looking out for your kids!
Thank you very much! I have to agree, it weighs on my shoulders because I am not good with confrontation but we do what’s best for our children and our family! ((HUGS))
Twitter: creativelyb
((hugs)) I know how this feels I’ve been in this battle for almost 2 years now, you’ll come out feeling like a whole new person and your confidence will be off the charts.
Brandy´s last [type] ..WW Computer Addict
Thank you!!! I appreciate your kind words, helps me to move forward!
Brandy,
I have done the EXACT same thing in the last week. I had to cut someone out of my life who was family. And you know what, it really sucks. Because family is what is SUPPOSED to be important, but so many people take it for granted. They treat you like crap, and constantly bring negativity. In my case, I am going through something huge personal wise (You may have seen it on facebook) and instead of actually supporting me, they were hateful and mean. I got nasty emails, phone calls, the whole nine yards.
You are doing what you have to do for YOU and your family. Your kids and Justin. At the end of the day you have to do what is right for you and you alone. Removing toxic people from your life is never easy, but it is worse when it is family, because they are supposed to be the ones who care.
I know what you are going through. ((hugs))
Making that decision never fells right until it is all said and done. People willing to spew judgmental BS at you are likely unhappy about something in their own life. I know you did all you could to make it work. Best wishes and try not to let emotions lead your decisions. Easier said than done, of course.
Well you truly spelled out your feelings and your decision you had to make. It wasn’t an easy one, but one you felt needed to be made. I too had to walk away from my family and a job recently. They are decisions that are hardest but in time will give you the most peace. You know its right when you are at peace. Take care Brandy, and god bless. Forget the naysayers. They obviously aren’t getting it.
Carole
carole harris´s last [type] ..An important party date! Please join me and some other
Brandy – You may be getting flack from this, but to be honest, I wish I were as brave as you…as strong as you. I am actually in a very similar situation and it really has gotten to the breaking point. I applaud you for sticking in there as long as you could, and I will stand up and applaud you for doing what is right for you and your family. Keep your chin up!
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Twitter: BrittanyGreer5
Sometimes the hardest choices are the ones we have to make about our loved ones. I’m sorry you are going through this.
The Greer 5 – Family & Life´s last [type] ..Seventh Generation Back To School Giveaway
I wish I had the courage to walk away from something very similar. I’ve tried and I’m just not strong enough to do so. I don’t know who Judy is, I’m guessing a family member of some sorts, but don’t let her spewing of non sense get to you. You do what is right for YOU and YOUR children.
Twitter: anddadtoo
Sorry you are going through this. It sounds like an extremely tough situation but I am sure if you are making this decision it is the one that is needed to be made. You need to do what is best for you even if it means cutting off a family member especially if they are hurting you mentally. I hope everything works out!
Rob´s last [type] ..RMHC Day of Change